Hawthorne, USA – Amid the “very real risk of bankruptcy” faced by SpaceX, Elon Musk plans to auction off body hair plucked from his own taint.
The anticipated cash injection from this auction would allow SpaceX to ramp up production of its Starship Raptor engine, the main focus of concern for the company.
The auction is set to be held on Boxing Day, December 26th, 2021, known to be one of the largest shopping days in the world. It isn’t known how much money this auction will bring in but Musk is confident that die hard fans of the entrepreneur known for his electric car company, Tesla, as well as SpaceX will step up to the plate.
The hairs are going to be extracted using a special harvesting tool designed by SpaceX engineers. This harvesting tool, which looks very much like a conventional grooming tweezer, will explore the deepest crevasses of Musk’s taint, identify thick, robust hairs sprouting from exceptionally healthy and resilient follicles, and carefully extract them and place them in an airtight container. This process will allow for maximum uniqueness and authenticity.
The extraction process is actually very sophisticated. We’ve added a chip to the harvesting tool that uses AI (artificial intelligence) to determine which hairs to extract and which ones to leave. Depending on the length, quality, and integrity of the hairs, we are hoping to extract at least 10 hairs. And using a complex algorithm, we will be able to calculate a taint/depth to follicular integrity ratio, which will then determine the value of the hair.
-Elon Musk, CEO of Tesla and SpaceX
Musk does not plan to sell off bushels of hair. Rather, his plan to sell off each hair into a specially designed glass container as a collector’s item may yield him the most money.
Haden Sheppard, a long time fan of Elon Musk fan from New York, is super excited for the auction. He believes that there are many people around the world that want to see SpaceX grow and succeed. He also believes that the large Elon Musk fanbase will render the ultimate goal of thwarting off bankruptcy a success.
Although Sheppard doesn’t think he’ll have enough money to place an opening bid on the taint hairs, let alone win a bid, he says that a lot of people who were inspired by Musk made a lot of money because of him. “They’ll gladly give back to SpaceX simply because they’re so inspired by his goal of making space travel accessible for all.”
The auction is set to take place on December 26, 2021, at 6pm PST on the SpaceX website. Registration prior to the auction is required with credit card or crytpo wallet information linked to your account beforehand.
