Nabraska, USA – People of colour who identify themselves as anti-vaccine, COVID-19 truthers, and other COVID-19 conspiracy theory advocates, are distancing themselves from a claim that drinking one’s own urine can help fight and cure COVID-19.
A prominent anti-vaccine leader, Christopher Key, has claimed that he drinks his own urine and would prefer that to the vaccine. He claims that drinking his own urine has prevented him from contracting the virus, which he calls fake, and that he is in good health.
However, many non-white anti-vaccine advocates have raised eyebrows at this claim and are even a bit embarrassed that one of their leaders is so adamant that everyone drink their own fluid waste.
Reggie Malone, an African-American, has been involved in the anti-vaccine movement for a little over the year and has raised his eye brows at the claim.
“Hey, I’m all for using medicines and natural remedies to fight off the ‘rona, if it does exist, which we still don’t know if it does, but HELL NAH! I ain’t drinkin’ piss, let alone my own piss. That’s some straight up white people shit. That’s just nasty. Y’all white folk can drink y’all urine. I ain’t doin’ that shit at all.”
-Reggie Malone, anti-vaccine advocate
Many other non-white people have also spoken out. However, they have been ridiculed relentlessly by mostly white, pro-urine drinkers. Since the anti-vaccine movement overlaps with the white supremacy movement, many anti-vaxers are fearful of racial demonization from the white anti-vaxers over their opposition to drinking their own urine.
“Who the hell drinks their own piss?” one POC anti-vaccine advocate asked under the condition of anonymity, as he dry heaved in disgust. “That’s some white people shit.”
White, pro-urine drinking anti-vaxers vehemently disagree with this sentiment. They say that urine is a safe, natural, and universally accessible cure that big pharma doesn’t want anyone to know about.
Colleen Smith, an anti-vaxer from Hicksville, Tennessee, and avid urine drinker since the news came out, says that it’s urine drinking is universal.
“I know people in Russia, in Poland, hell, even in the hills of Bulgaria, that drink their own piss to cure a wide variety of disease. It’s just that over here in America, big pharma has a monopoly on cures and treatments. Medicines that go against the mainstream seem weird to us. But they’re not.” She went on to say, “Piss drinking, placenta eating, fecal bathing, semen scrubbing, and other alternative treatments, have been around for centuries.”
-Colleen Smith, urine drinker
Despite several pleas and begging, Colleen insisted she demonstrate how she drinks her own urine. She took out a plastic BPA free water bottle, pulled her mom jeans down to her knees, assumed a semi-squat position, and proceeded to urinate into the bottle. Impressively, she produced a stream that yielded little to no splatter.
She then held the approximately 300mL of urine up to her eyes, inspecting the contents. “Mmm…nice and warm,” she commented in pleasure, and proceeded to drink the urine all in one breath.
After what she felt was a satisfying fill, she told us that she had a hunch that drinking urine would eventually come out as a method to fight COVID, but that she was waiting for the research to come out and prove it’s efficacy against the virus.
Satirica could not find a single peer reviewed scientific study that demonstrates drinking one’s own urine has any positive effects against COVID-19.
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels
